We all come to a situation when our children start reacting to whatever we say to them in a very angry manner. Sometimes they become angry kids because of a reason not associated with us. It becomes very difficult to deal with them at times. Here we suggest 7 things to avoid when your child is angry.
What is child anger?
Anger is a temporary emotional state caused by frustration and it signals the deepest level of unhappiness. The fact is that children are not equipped with a full range of language skills which means they communicate through their emotions based on impulses and feelings.
Major reasons for anger in children?
- Needing attention
- Feeling powerless or helpless
- Being misunderstood
- Being disappointed
- Not feeling good about themselves
- Having difficulty saying what they need
your feeling when your child is angry with you??
Some parents get angry on themselves and start yelling, some parents don’t try to solve the problem and simply walked out without saying anything, while some parents frightened over the situation.
Coping with the child anger
Handling children’s anger can be puzzling, draining and distressing for parents. Children irritate you hoping you will give in and let them have their ways. Children push your buttons to get attention because they want you to feel guilty and blame yourself when you punish them, because they are angry at you. You can’t in any way control the way your child feels about things – all you can do it give him consequences and hold him accountable for his behaviors The best anger management strategy for children is you, as a parent, to be a good role model, to familiarize yourself with anger management tips, strategies and techniques that both help you to cope with the stresses of modern day living as well as being anger management tools to share with your children. Here are few things for you to avoid doing when your child is angry:
- Not giving the angry kids some time to cool down: As a parent, one of the most difficult things you will ever have to do is to manage your child’s behavior when they are in an angry, volatile mood. If you will try to say something at the time of explosion the things will become worst instead of improving. Give your child sometime to calm down.
- Acting emotionally, not rationally: When your child is angry, don’t communicate, walk away and leave him alone for a few minutes (if the kid is old enough to stay alone in this situation). During that time the child can rethink, calm down and determine what to do next. Stepping back can help the child as well as you to think logically and stop the progression and determine to respond positively.
- Arriving at any conclusions about your child’s anger: In some cases your child may not be wrong feeling upset but his behavior may not be respectful explaining his viewpoint, then you will need to leave him alone till he calms down and later make him accountable for his behavior Don’t expect that your child will be happy with all your decisions he may have different perspective on the same which tend to become him angry.
- Attempt to reason it out then and there with an angry child: Avoid having rational conversation when your child is angry as his mind may not be ready to hear logic. Allow him to cool off to make him understand the situation.
- Not staying , posing threats in the heat of the moment: Don’t punish your child when the emotions are high. Give consequences that motivate your child to change his behavior. Try to choose the consequence that get through to your child.
- Not having a talk with your child later: If your child is old enough hold some constructive discussion about his crazy behavior with him and guide him to solve his problems. This is THE most important thing to do with your teen children.
- Loosing the purpose, the goal for the child to develop self analysis skill: Self analysis is very much required to give them appropriate behavior techniques. This will help children understand their position as well parents position. Give them time to develop this skill.
These are some tips for dealing with that angry kid, who appears now and then in our homes, our own sons and daughters!